MAN PISSES PANTS FOR CASH, GOV’T SEIZES THE HAUL

What would you do to make a cool five grand?

A Norwegian student urinated on himself on camera to win a somewhat unconventional $5,000 contest; however, he’s saying his money went down the toilet when customs officials seized his cash, according to a report in the New York Post.

“It’s wrong to take the money that I worked for,” said an angry 23-year-old Dan Holt from Haugesund. “I got interrogated by police but I can’t take the blame for this.”

Holt first caught wind of this infamous “5,000 challenge” taking place on Instagram by the Finnish sunglasses company Nopeet in November, he recounted.

The company encouraged participants to record themselves doing the most “insane” possible thing they could think of, then say the slogan “Nopeet made me do it!” and post the video with a hashtag for the company, as described in a post announcing the contest.

“I thought, I’m going to give it a shot,” Holt explained, going on to say he needed the quick cash. “It sounded fun and I like to push myself.”

To get the top prize, this thrill-seeker dressed up in a Santa outfit and took a long inhale from his favorite bong, which he said contained tobacco, at his local mall. Then he puked and rode his bike directly into a freezing cold river. As his grand finale, he recorded footage of himself pissing his pants inside the mall as bystanders stared in amazement and confusion.

“Everybody’s jaws dropped,” he said proudly. “People were like, what the fuck is going on? But the whole point was to do the most crazy possible thing.”

He then uploaded the spirited video to Instagram and discovered on Jan. 5 that he was the winner and would receive the prize money from the company by mail.

For theatrical impact, the company put the prize money in a Bible and requested the Norwegian record himself opening it, Holt explained.

However, the “sketchy looking” parcel was taken only days later by Norwegian customs, and Holt was then interrogated by Haugesund Police for failing to declare a large amount of money, Holt described.

Nopeet went on to defend their contest winner, posting a picture of the cash-filled holy book on the company’s Instagram along with the remark, “This is UNFAIR!”

“Norwegian authorities didn’t take part in the #NopeetMadeMeDoIt challenge and now they try to steal the prize money that belongs to @igordieseltv by confiscating it. This is UNFAIR! If they wanted the prize money, they should have taken part in the challenge,” the firm said in a statement.

The company continued, “Our lawyers are already working on suing the Norwegian authorities.“

The company offered a bizarre theory for why authorities were so keen to take the money:

“The only logical reason for this desperate act is the decreasing price of oil. When oil was still expensive, Norwegian authorities weren’t forced to run after the pennies of unfortunate individuals just to support their families.”

Holt’s spirits have been sopped, and now he says he just wants the money he earned.

“I didn’t do anything illegal. I was just the winner of competition,” he argued. “That’s a lot of money to me. It would help me move forward in life….I guess I know now I have to declare money — but that’s probably the only lesson I learned…Doing the videos was still fun.”

As of Thursday, Norwegian Customs and Haugesund Police have not commented on the status of the money.

3 thoughts on “Man Pisses Pants For Cash, Gov’t Seizes The Haul

  1. Somebody get this total MadLad his well earned prize money!! Also shame on Nopeet for destroying the Bible to send the money! I’m sure you could have found a Quran around somewhere!!!

  2. Even the explanation of the seizure being due to him not declaring the money is dodgy. It is not like in the United States where you need to declare lottery, sweepstakes and gambling wins to the IRS: Contest and lottery prizes in Norway, like the rest of the Nordic countries and most of Europe, are tax-free. Unless the authorities think they can prove that these are proceeds of crime, I don’t think they have a leg to stand on. (Not that such will matter in practice. As we see from the US presidential election, right and wrong have nothing to do with it).

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